I have my first IVF beta this morning. Knowing that I have already gotten a positive pregnancy test from peeing on a stick is giving me some peace of mind (I don't think I could have made it through the holiday weekend without taking one). The only thing is that I can't shake this worry...so many things are telling me to believe that it's true and move on like a "normal" person, but none of this has been normal. I am really hoping to find out today my HcG levels and even possibly if we're having twins or not. Either way, I'm happy, but still scared out of my wits!
God, I sound like such an asshole...this is the only thing that I've been waiting for since January of 2006 and I can't accept it. What the hell is the matter with me? I go between happiness, fear, excitement, idiocy, doubt, joy, disbelief, and everything else someone could throw at me. I do hope that I'll feel more settled after hearing the beta numbers, but we'll see...I'll post when I know.
For all that need some smiles this Christmas...check out this video!
Update: Our Beta test just came back and my level is 956 (normal for a single pregnancy is 300-600) - YIKES! The nurse said that is a "nice" number, so I'm happy. She actually said, "you're pregnant." I actually said it for the first time because I haven't until today! I needed some medical confirmation that this roller coaster ride is hitting a high! We know that we are by no means out of the woods, but things are looking good so far! We're going back on Friday for another one, so we'll know more then. This is a little high for this day of my cycle, so we're still wondering if twins are in the mix, but hopefully we'll see on Friday!