That would be my sister...spinning is the activity of which I was speaking. When I started out, I was worried people would think I was talking about having sex...how embarrassing! People don't watch that though (thank God...they'd be waiting forever for the next episode!). Then I considered that it could also be church...that would mean that we'd actually make it to church and since my spin class is on Sunday mornings, that's been out of the schedule for a while. It's not that I'm putting losing weight ahead of God, but it's bad timing!
Is it me? Or is having kids tough on a marriage? Bill and I always get a little short with/want to beat the living shit out of each other around this time of year. It's a combination of the holidays being over, everything outside the house being dead and gray, and being cooped up more than we'd like. We run into this issue (nit-picking, stupid fights, blaming each other for everything that goes wrong) every single year and can't figure out how to deal with it. Take that and put it on top of two little ones who are into everything, can't comprehend that the word "no" means not to do something...not do it more, and who make a huge mess of our house on a daily basis and we're kind of screwed!
His main complaint is that I am forgetting a lot of things that we talk about. He's right...I am forgetting a lot of what he says. There could be many reasons for this. 1. I am keeping all of the kid shit together in my head, 2. I am keeping all of my tutoring shit together in my head, 3. We are talking while I am taking care of the kids, 4. I am freaking exhausted!, 5. I don't think it's as important as he does. The communication is definitely off with us and we need to work on that. The good thing is that we're pretty good at talking through our problems (as long as I remember to listen). The bad thing is that when the hell are we going to have time to sit down and talk? We need to carve some time out of each day to sit down and talk...face-to-face (I say this b/c much of our conversation during the day is done on the phone or via email...a lot lost in translation).
One more thing before I wrap this one up...for those of you who have your family close, even if you're ready to kill them, hug them. It is so hard to do this without any help. I am going to bite the bullet and call a babysitter...finally got a number, so I have got to get on this. The only thing that Bill and I do for ourselves is going to the gym. We don't do anything as a couple b/c we really can't find the time or can't fathom/don't want/are too damn tired to take the babies with us. The only times that we have done anything as a couple this year has been when a friend has stayed with the kids, when my Mom is around, and when we went to my SIL's wedding. So, those of you who have help or can turn to someone to cover the kids while you go to an appointment or run out to the store, thank your lucky stars...
Ummm...Please Don't Steal My Craziness...Okay? Thanks!
People I Love...follow along if you're so inclined!
6 comments:
Your funny! Yes kids are hard on a marraige, They change everything. I mean for the better but its still a change. The lack of sleep and constant worry and work ends up making me a moody women. Its bound to result in a few fights.
I know girl ... it would be so great to have someone that didn't charge 15 bucks/hour to hang with E Squared. Jon and I are in the same boat ... I did just put them in that little preschool/daycare place.... La Petite Academy. While it is a little pricey it is so worth it because I know every Tues/Thurs I will be able to have a while 5 hours to do whatever I want to ...and since Jon and I are both nurses our schedule is fortunately not M-F 9-5. We could possibly spend some of that time together ...if I choose to spend it with him. hahahaha
Babysitters are great ... a sane mommy is a great mommy!!!
Yep, these kids not only push us to our limits, but also our relationships. My husband and I have definitely had our seasons and just when I think we have nothing to say to one another, something sparks us and we find our groove again.
Hope you are able to find some time to be alone with Bill!
yes i win! woo hoo! what do i get? a free visit with the twinnies? jeff and i have been at each other's throats lately and we DON'T have kids! you and bill do a great job. i agree with the babysitter thing...even if it's for a couple hours and you guys can go get some coffee or something. it's worth it :) wish i lived closer to help!
We have never bickered so much since we had the twins. It is a lot to handle for anyone. We seem to fight constantly on the weekends when we're both home with the kids. Even when they're at their best, it is still exhausting and stressful. I think you are superwoman for staying home with your two angels.
We are lucky to have my parents close by. I can't imagine how you guys have managed this long without a sitter! We've been thinking about finding someone (for the times my parents are gone since they travel a lot), but it is overwhelming, isn't it?
I love your honesty!
Funny, we're going through a bickering stage too - arguing about STUPID things.
but I must disagree, I think it's better to have your family far, far away :) or maybe that's just me!
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