Ummm...Please Don't Steal My Craziness...Okay? Thanks!

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Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Writer's Workshop...Have You Ever...

Have you ever wished so badly that your husband would leave for work and then miss him the minute he walks out the door?

Have you ever wondered why old friends never call you?

Have you ever thought a magazine was "too young" for you?

Have you ever wanted to give your dog away?

Have you ever been so afraid to lose someone that you couldn't even pick up the phone to call for fear that he/she was already gone?

Have you ever realized just how strong you really are?

Have you ever eaten two cookies knowing that those two could lead to the whole package?

Have you ever taken N.yquil just so you wouldn't hear the babies in the middle of the night with the hope of possibly getting a full night's sleep?

Have you ever wondered "if you have a housekeeper, nanny, chauffeur, personal trainer, and life coach," would you be as hot as a celebrity or would you sit around and get soft?

Have you ever sunbathed topless?

Have you ever intentionally "not seen" someone in public...only to be caught?

Have you ever moved away from a place knowing that you would have to live there again at some point?

Play along with MamaKat (if you're so inclined...this is not a demand, but an invitation).

Couple of Things...can't form complete thoughts anymore...what is happening to me???

  • Holy shit, it's June...God, I feel like Husband when I say shit like that. He's one of those people who is always surprised that the next month is coming up so quickly and I just don't get it, but now I feel like him which makes me feel badly for making fun of him for the past 5 years.
  • Got new shoes that make me feel a little sexy. Love them!

  • Matt got Hailey's virus...shit, we all got Hailey's virus. Matt's cough is horrific. We had Husband's cousin and his son in for the weekend and I am feeling terribly guilty for exposing them to this. There's nothing really bad about this virus (save the fever and coughing), but still...the guilt remains. Seriously though...nothing seemed wrong with Matt at all...even Cousin said so...when I made the dreaded phone announce exposure.
  • I hope BFF (Cousin's wife) will forgive me, but I haven't heard from her, so she'll probably never play with us again.
  • BFF, if you're reading, call me!
  • More virus means less crap we can do with other people. I long for human contact. I mean real human contact...with adults...who do more than grunt at me.
  • I need to make returns to stores from last week's shopping escapades, but am afraid that I'll spend more $$$ when I step into stores. What a dilemma!!!
  • I haven't been to the gym in over a week...blah...I actually miss it...the smelly shoes, the rubbery floors, the wet footprints from random people that gross me out, the zen of yoga, the sweat from spin, the hum of hair dryers from people who can actually leave their kids in the kids zone long enough to squeeze in a shower, the tugging and pulling of the Crazies to get them out of the parking lot and into the building...I miss it all (don't tell Husband...he still thinks I hate the gym).
  • Every time I think I'm "fat," I'm going to get down and give myself 20...push-ups...real ones...knees are for wimps!
  • Coffee is my savior lately.
  • I still cannot comprehend how people co-sleep.
  • I'm wearing waterproof mascara for the entire summer in the prospect of doing something unanticipated and on the edge, aren't I?
  • I'm really interested in this, but wonder if I have the time to start my own non-profit organization (insert hilarious laughter here) and if Matthew will get pissed b/c I'm only concentrating on boys.
  • I love Babysitter...she is making our lives so much easier! I wish I knew her Mom so I could gush about her.
  • These two are getting into all sorts of trouble lately...yesterday Matt slapped Hailey in the face and left a mark. Oh, and pinching has eeked its way into our house...lovely, right? It's a good thing they're cute!

I was too freaking lazy to put these pictures through picnik to get my blog name on them, so let me just say this. If anyone in the "blogosphere" (hate that word) even thinks about taking my pictures and starting their own blog to pretend that these two are their own kids, I will hunt them down and kill them...that's my it? Can you believe people even do that...GET A LIFE!!!