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Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Is Lying Learned?

We've had a ridiculously high pretty good amount of fibbing going on around here lately.

My kids just turned two in the middle of August.  That's not too long ago.

Anyway, I don't need to tell you how young they are...the basic point is, they're lying like freaking rugs!

They immediately go into defense mode when they know they've done something wrong and have the ability to determine right from TWO!

There are many people in this world that will contend that children are brought into this world as the most innocent of innocents.  They can do no wrong and learn all of their "bad" behaviors from watching adults.  Their halos are more brightly lit than anyone else in the world.

REALLY???  Come to my house for a little reality check.

When I was teaching middle school, and there was an incident that involved the child lying, the parent would often say, "Not my child.  Why would they lie?  My child has never lied before, so I believe them.  You must be mistaken."  REALLY???  Are you serious???  Your child has NEVER lied?

I don't buy it.

All children lie.

Even the ones whose halos are still lit.

I believe lying is an innate behavior.  I believe that human beings are born knowing that they should stay out of trouble (hmmm...fight or flight comes to mind as an innate defense mechanism).  The Crazies know that they don't want to get in trouble.  Trouble means Mommy/Daddy gets mad.  We  don't smile at them.  We put them in time-out for their punishment.  We make them apologize for their actions.  Who would want to go through all of that?  Just say, "no, I didn't do that."

Here is my conundrum...

How can I teach 2-year olds what lying is and that they shouldn't be doing it? 
I'm trying to use the word "honest" in many of our conversations, but do they really get it? 
Am I underestimating them? 
Are they capable of distinguishing between a lie and the truth? 
If they're able to distinguish right from wrong, they could certainly handle the difference between a lie and the truth, right?
Could my kids be that smart at this young age?
How bad is this going to get???  If they're doing this NOW, what am I facing for the future?

If anyone could impart any wisdom upon me, I'd be forever in your debt.  I know my kids are "getting it" and I know they're trying to use "it" against me.  Now I just need to know how to get "it" before "it" gets me!!!

Just trying to keep my head above water here!

This picture just made me laugh...poor Hillary!  What in the WORLD is she doing there???