...and that's usually as far as I get before my once honed social skills fail me once again.
Let's face it...I used to have good social skills.
I could start a conversation, maintain a conversation, and even follow along in a conversation.
Then came the Crazies.
Recently, I have found myself making small talk at various places...the grocery store, the gym, the library...and every time I'm finished with one of these short conversations, I ask myself, "what the fuck did we just talk about?"
I've also asked myself, "did that even make any sense?"
A woman at yoga complimented me on my mat last week...this is how the conversation went...I think...don't quote me:
That's a nice mat.Thanks...I got it at Target.Oh...I love that place.Yeah...I had to get a pretty mat so I could start yoga at home before I realized I could do it without falling over.End conversation.
WTF did I just talk about??? I meant to say something about how I had to get a pretty mat so that I'd be motivated to work out at home, but it didn't come out like that at all...and it took me an entire day to realize what I was actually trying to say. Now that woman thinks that a conversation about Target leads to me talking about what a klutz I am and how I fall down in the middle of my own living room...way to draw her in to my circle of friends, huh?
Not to mention the fact that I have completely walked away from people in the middle of a conversation.
I meant to finish the conversation, but got distracted and never went back...WTF?
Sure, I'll apologize later on...if I ever see the person again, but seriously...people must think I'm crazy!
I still remember talking to one of the preschool Moms about how she was moving into a new house and somehow ending up talking about the unused vibrator that I'm completely scared of in my bedside table. Something about how I'm afraid to move because I'm worried that the scary vibrator will somehow make its way out of the bedside table and end up in the movers' hands...how the hell did I make the leap from moving to vibrators??? I'd like to know!!!
I'm sure she would too! LOL
I'm not all failed stories and unended conversations though...yesterday I met a woman and carried on a fairly decent conversation about our summer plans while catching the Crazies coming down a water slide...and neither of them drowned* more than once. Go me!
I'm pretty sure I talk to another Mom about Cheez-its too. No water-related accidents during that conversation either.
So, there you have it...a year and a half of infertility treatments, 38.5 weeks of twin pregnancy, 2 years of fogginess due to twin infancy, a 9 month recovery from a knee injury, and I'm a total social reject.
How about you guys? Do you have trouble with this shit too? Is your brain mushy? Have you left conversations thinking "WTF did I just say???"
* By "drowned," I mean that they completely avoid standing up at the bottom of the water slide and end up going underwater...where they still don't stand up. Nice survival skills, huh? They just wait for me (a non-swimmer) to rescue** them...erg.
** By "rescue," I mean yank them out of the water before the next kid comes down and plows right into their skulls. I then plop them back on level ground or steer them to the ladder and wish them the best of luck. I can't be in three places at once, so I choose the bottom of the slide...seems to make the most sense to me, but WTF do I know?
19 comments:
LOL now that I don't have problems with.
Although I do tend to talk a little too much :)
Maybe you come across as really interesting? At least they're not likely to forget you. Hahahha :)
by "interesting" i think marcia means "weird"...hahahahaha
you've had some of those conversations with me, but i'm used to conversations like that because of my dementia patients.
Again, please don't be afraid...you'll thank me later.
I couldn't vote on your poll because I just pulled my head out of my ass after a month long hiatus in blogging...yes, please join Twitter...it needs you.
Most of the time I'm just too freakin' worn out to hold a conversation anymore and the last thing I go to Yoga for is conversation....
Why is it so hard to make new friends when we are surrounded by moms everywhere?
i do this on a regular basis. i'm so glad to learn it's not just me. most recently we met up with our friends, who also have twins, and i have NO idea what we talked about. i don't remember half of it. i do remember thinking, however, that they seemed to have their shit together enough to have conversations....but then again they were just kind of letting their kids do whatever they want.
i used to be good at making friends and whatnot. i'm not so good anymore. my exercise class in the morning is one big clique. i only talk to the kid next to me. everyone else goes out for drinks and hangs out. i get in and out and home.
maybe we can form a support group? :)
I only have one so I blame my brain mush on the sleep deprivation I am suffering from. I have to write everything down or I will have no recollection of it later. Luckily I don;t have a vibrator in my drawer to ramble about.
Green baby poop though? That may get mentioned.
Yup, I'm pretty socially inept as of late. Gets even worse on FB, online where you don't have the advantage of tone to help anything.
I have never been good with small talk and was grateful to have kids so I could have someone else to talk about (and grateful for many other reasons too, of course!). But I find I still don't do very well and I leave many conversations unfinished due to having to referee/save/etc. Mommy Brain is a real thing. That's what I keep telling myself.
I tend to silently blame "baby brain" for my lapses...although I'm not sure how long I can legally use that excuse. The worst is when I have the girls with me, so I'm keeping one eye on them, AND trying to talk...it's not good.
I forget words, sentences, thoughts, all mid-word, sentence, and thought. Lord.
All part of parenting, ladies Then you hit 60 and don't remember conversations because of some disease (I forget what's it called) :)
I love your Mom...she cracks me up!!!
Umm...I want to know more about this vibrator conversation. How did that come out? I only have one friend I talk to about sex/vibrators and all that nonsense, but a random one at school?! No way!
I don't know what a conversation is unless it is on the phone uninterrupted by three needy children. I had a random conversation at with another twin mom at the pool the other day and I felt comfortable having such a random unfinished convo, because we both had our hands full keeping an eye on our children. But, I still thought, maybe I should have ended the conversation some how???
Oh girl- I'm total and complete mess when it comes to this stuff!
Did your sister just compare you with her dementia patients? ha! Now that's love!
I totally almost spit my lunch out earlier reading about you telling someone about your vibrator...bwahaha!!
Yeah, this happens to me all the time. The worst times are at work. I'm constantly searching for the word I want mid-sentence to no avail and then trailing off on tangents. It is so frustrating and people must think I've lost my mind. I think I've managed to get my shit together enough to avoid it truly effecting my work, but sometimes I wonder what others are thinking.
i ran into a high school acquaintance at day care yesterday and mid conversation (as I'm putting Haddie in her car seat) I looked down and noticed I had two different shoes on. I was wearing sandals with heels at work and had flip flops in the car. I meant to change into the flip flops in the car, but I guess I got distracted after changing only one. You would think I would notice walking with one foot in a flip flop and the other in a heel!
LOL
I know exactly what you mean! It's why I love social media so much, I'm better at talking when I don't actually have to talk. I can just type. On my own time. Without children screaming. And without saying "please stop poking your sister" in the middle of my sentence.
Small talk is over rated! :)
I don't even bother anymore. If I can complete a sentence at any point during the day, it's success, even if I'm just talking to myself.
Happens to me all the time. So embarassing... Seriously I should not be allowed out in public anymore.
My children also refuse to stand up at the end of the slide, or really anywhere else in the pool they happen to fall down. So while tiny little babies wander around blisfully uninhibited, my 3 years olds wear life jackets. And probably will until they are at least 18... :)
I feel the same exact way. For instance at lunch today, did either of us at any point talk about one thing for more than 48 seconds? Nope. However we both kept the convo and gossip going even while controlling three mini-firefighters. You should see me on campus trying to talk to other college students. I try to "get on their level" and not talk about diapers and such, but I just sound crazy.
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