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Tuesday, February 8, 2011

Tuesday's Terror...yes, I'm a tad dramatic

Yes, that's an illustration of the latest item of baby crap that is giving me the terrors.

For serious.

The Crazies have only used the binks for sleep times...naps and bedtime.  We will defer to the occasional use on long car trips, but that's it.  They do not have them any other time.  I have stood firm on that.

So, why do they have to give them up now?  Doesn't anyone realize what this means for me???  

Yes, it's all about me...they'll barely remember this, but I'll remember it for a long long time.

Matt wakes up just about every night.  He has bad dreams that confuse him and wake him into a state of panic (that's right...the fun never ends).

I stumble in there, grab a bink, lovingly shove it into his mouth after slamming it into his cheeks several times...it's damn dark in there, lay him back down, cover him, and stumble back into bed (possibly cursing at Husband who hasn't moved at all).

It's so freaking easy!!!!  He's back to sleep in seconds and so am I.

Why in the world would I give that up?

When Husband's sister fell pregnant (I say that like it's a disease...WTF?), we decided that when Baby L came, we'd take the binks away from the Crazies and explain that the new baby needed them.  They'd understand, right?  They'd totally get it and we'd all be happy.

We've talked about it for a while.
We've ignored their whines that they don't want to do it.

We're the parents dammit...what we say goes and we made this decision.

Except I can't do it.

I can't let go.

So, at 6:01 this morning when Husband asked me if I had to get up last night because apparently he can't hear the babies waking up on his side of the bed which is a whole 3 feet away from mine...WTF???, I answered him.  

"Yes, twice.  Matt woke up with bad dreams."

"You know, we're going to have to get rid of the binks soon."

"Why?"  (clearly 6:04 AM is not my best time to have a serious conversation)

"It's time...Baby L is here and we said we'd do this."

"I do not recall that."  (That's right...I pulled the Bill Clinton)

"Seriously...we have to do it."

"I don't wanna."  (Yes, I whined, but only because this impacts me...not him, O Deaf One on the other side of the bed.)

"Okay...well, maybe we could do it slowly."

Scared silence answered him from my side of the bed...if I stopped talking, maybe he'd think the conversation was over and shut up.

"Maybe when we go in at night, we'll only give them their bink if they ask for it."

"Okay...that might work.  But let me clarify, by 'we,' you mean 'me,' right?"

(heavy sigh) "I seriously don't hear them, but when I do, I go in, right?"

"I guess...it hasn't happened in so long that I can't remember."

(another heavy sigh...he's big into nonverbals) "Okay, whatever, let's start this...only if they ask for it."

"Okay." (meekly)

OMGwhatthefuckdidijustdo????  

I'mgoingtoberubbingbackslikeallofthoseothersoothingmothersoutthereandthat'sjustnotme!!!!

I'mgoingtodie!!!!
"See you downstairs."

"Um...yeah." (all I wanted to do was curl up in a ball of my own pity and cry)

So, it starts tonight...Operation Screw Mommy Out of Any Sleep.  I'll keep you updated, of course...that's how I roll.

Bahahahahaa...as I wrote this, Hailey started screaming "my pink bink, my pink bink" and wouldn't you know?  I ran right up there to give it to her buy myself 20 more minutes to read blogs...well, she asked for it, right?