Ummm...Please Don't Steal My Craziness...Okay? Thanks!

People I Love...follow along if you're so inclined!

Thursday, April 7, 2011

Couponed to Death

I watched this show last night...I have no idea why I even watched it.

It took up 2 hours of my life because I just couldn't shut it off.

I heard about it on FB yesterday and was lured into the gossip about the ludicrously bizarre behavior of a particular group of people in our country.

Coupon Queens

Extreme Couponers

People Who Revolve Their Lives Around Coupons and Spend 5-6 Hours at a Grocery Store Trying to Spend as Little Money as Possible on Crappy Food

Yup...I can't really think of a good name for them because there isn't one.

I'm the woman at the grocery store check-out who always embarrassingly mumbles "no" to the "do you have any coupons today?" question.  I'm never quite sure why it embarrasses me, but it does.  I feel that if I'm going to spend that much money on groceries, then I should at least be trying to save money.

So, I'll suck it up.  I'll open up one of those circulars that arrive at the end of our driveway and I'll look through it.  I'll always get stuck on the "free" checks that they're offering because the designs are just so nice and pretty!

Then I realize that I'm wasting my time.  There is nothing in this circular that we use.  As a matter of fact, in my opinion, most of the foods for which they offer coupons are just over-processed crappy foods!  Thanks a lot, coupon Gods...you just screwed me again!

I'd like a coupon for strawberries...then I'd like you to double it (did you even know that stores did that???  They double coupons???  I had no idea) and then I'd like to buy 24,000 pounds of strawberries.  

Hmmm...maybe that's why it wouldn't work.  Who can eat that many strawberries?

Okay, I'd like you to offer a coupon on my organic milk.  No?  Oh, okay...I tried.

What about Boar's Head?  Do they offer coupons?  No?  Oh, okay...just thought I'd give it a shot.

Then there's the clutter...don't even get me started on the clutter.  Some of these people filled up their entire garage with their "stockpile."  Some kept it in their own bedrooms...sexy, right?  Some of them would even fill spaces in their kids' rooms!  WTF??? 

Here I am, trying to get rid of the clutter in my life and they're bringing in caseloads of cereal...I think I may have a different philosophy on the worth of these items.

Is it really worth my family's space, time, and zen-like feeling we have when we enter our home* to have 50 bottles of salad dressing, 75 boxes of sugary cereal, 900 pounds of ground beef (not even lean), 400 rolls of toilet paper, 60 deodorants, 210 bottles of soda (killing your brain), 65 containers of overprocessed noodle meals, 400 cans of crap???

I don't think it is.

So, maybe the next time the cashier asks if I have any coupons**, I'll feel less embarrassed because what I do have is peace of mind...can't double that and carry it home on a forklift.

What about you?  Do you "coupon?" If you do, how much time per week do you spend on it?  I'm just really curious!

*  I kid about the zen-like feeling...half the time, I seriously wonder if we have been robbed when we walk back into our home!!!

**  In all fairness, while I was watching these shows, I did try to find some coupons for the healthy items that we do buy every single week.  I was mildly successful.  God, does that mean they've sucked me in???