Last week I asked if you were lonely.
Sinead always seemed lonely in that video with her G.I. Jane haircut...so alone.
It's nothing personal...sometimes I just feel like I am lonely and wanted to know if anyone else in this world felt the same way.
I guess that some of you do...go me...maybe I'm not so alone.
Here's the thing though - everyone has different definitions of "lonely."
I sometimes feel like I want to call someone, but I have no one to call...my friends are either busy with their own kids or working. My family is either working or (I suspect) bored of my stories. Husband ends up getting the call.
There are times I'd rather call a girlfriend though...and I don't always have that option.
Remember back in middle school and high school when you lived for your friends?
Remember back in your college years when you lived for your friends?
Then it all starts to fall apart as people get jobs, move away, get married, have kids...I love how I consider the coming together of one's life as when "it all starts to fall apart." That's not at all how I should describe it...it's more of a beginning of life getting more difficult.
That's not exactly cheery either, is it?
I miss working...there, I said it. I miss working because I had a built-in society of people who would check in with me every day. They'd ask how I was doing and really give a shit. They would know what was happening in my life.
Today, I talk to my friends infrequently...thank God I don't have any of those friends who get pissed if we don't talk all the time...I'm not a good phone person. When we do talk, it's usually about how busy we are.
God, is this what life is going to be? B.O.R.I.N.G.
I miss my friends though. I miss seeing them. I miss shooting the shit. I miss just hanging around. It's like there's no time for that anymore. We get together for "events," but that's all...it's just such an effort and I miss the days where it was effortless.
I envy people's neighbors...how sad, right? I also don't have great neighbors. Well, I have neighbors who keep up with their houses and are polite and we chat every now and then, but I don't have the kind of neighbors that I often hear about. The neighbors who would take your kids for an afternoon. The neighbors who stop by for a glass of wine unannounced. The neighbors who would mow your lawn for you when you're away. Do those even exist anymore? Or do I think everyone else lives on Wisteria Lane?
So, I guess, in some respects, I'd say that I'm lonely...lonely for a built-in society of people that care about me...not one that has to be sought out. Does that make sense? Does this entire post even make sense?
If it doesn't, just unfollow me...seems to be a popular move these days...adding to my loneliness.
New poll up...less emotional...check it out...upper right corner.