Ummm...Please Don't Steal My Craziness...Okay? Thanks!

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Thursday, April 21, 2011

I Never...

  • I never drank pickle juice straight from the jar...or soy sauce after finished my sushi.

  • I never had an overwhelming urge to throw everything that is plastic out of my house.

  • I never spent 30 minutes making a dollhouse that isn't mine look totally pristine.

  • I never cried when said dollhouse was destroyed by an "Ex-ca-Batorrrrrr."

  • I never thought Husband was insane for holding onto 5000 empty boxes "just in case" something had to be returned...something about original packaging...blah, blah, blah.
 
  • I never considered making two cups of coffee at the same time just knowing I'd need them.

  • I never had back pain so bad that I literally turned around in the mirror just to see if something was actually growing out of my back.

  • I never shoved a piece of chocolate in my mouth so quickly that I thought I might gag.

  • I never lied to a Crazy about said piece of chocolate claiming that it was yucky medicine.

  • I never let the Crazies run around a shoe store until I found the shoes that I liked.

  • I never told them that it didn't matter which one they liked, I was paying...they'd like the one I liked.

  • I never told my child, "well, hit him back..."

  • I never use the television to get a few minutes of quiet.

  • I never wished that preschool lasted all summer long...out loud...in front of all the other preschool Moms...and the teacher.

  • I never played the "I Never" game drunk.

  • I never even got drunk!


  • I never wanted to punch someone in the face for talking all the way through spin class.

  • I never called my son's "unit" Captain Pecker and the laughed hysterically when he repeated it.

  • I never just wanted to crawl back under the covers on a cold and rainy morning.

  • I never thought about teaching Hailey how to use the Xbox remote so that she can turn on Netflix whenever she wants.

  • I never flip people off while I'm driving.

  • I never wanted to hire a laundry service.

  • I never peed my pants while sneezing.
Wanna play along?  What have you "never done" that you'd be willing to share in the comments?  See, if you write it in the comments, no one knows...ah...the joys of the internet!