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Thursday, May 5, 2011

So, Because I Was Sick, They Sent Back My Application for Mother of the Year

That's right...the CFMA (Council for Mom Awards) sent back my awesome application for Mother of the Year just because I got sick.

I'll admit it...being sick doesn't not bring out the best Mom in me, but give me a break!

We were in survival mode...well, I was...the Crazies were feeling much better, so they were in sabotage mode.

I did the best I could...after all, they're still alive, right?  I did drop the ball though...a lot...there were balls all over the place (that's what she said).

Here are just a few of my dropped balls:

  • Let's start with the movies...quite a few were watched all in the last week all in the search of a few minutes of peace and quiet so my head would stop pounding.  Then I committed the biggest sin of all (in my little tiny mind), I put on Madagascar on the way home from the mall yesterday.  I just need some QUIET!!!  In the past, I've told them that the DVD player in the car only works if we're driving more than an hour.  Thank God they can't tell time.

  • A friend of mine called right at the end of lunch the other day.  I wanted to have an actual conversation as she's been crazy busy lately and I've been wrapped in SickWorld, so I relented to the Crazies' requests for a "special treat."  I handed them these gigantic chocolate bunny lollipops that came in an awesome treat package from Papa and let them gnaw away at them while I talked for 15 minutes.  Every time one of them would pipe up with something "important" to say, I would redirect their attention to finishing the ears.  That's right...I only let them finish the ears...I have standards, ya know!!

  • I issued empty threats in the card store.  We had to get Mother's Day cards for everyone and their mother...literally (freaking $40 to Hallmark...thank you very much!).  I took them in there one morning to "help" me decide what to get.  Well, they were instantly enthralled with the Tiana and Cars cards, so I told them they had to hold hands.  This lead to a vicious round of Tug-o-War between the Crazies and I ended up saying things like this:  "If you do that again, we're leaving."  "Stop pulling each other, or we're out of here and we won't get cards for anyone and everyone will hate us."  "Come on, guys...I'm almost finished."  Yeah, empty threats just aren't the norm for me, but I was desperate.  Anyway, it couldn't have been that bad because when I got up to the cashier, she applauded their behavior that told them how good they were.  I smiled wanly because of how lame I was.  The Crazies proceeded to squish the candy bars when she wasn't looking.

  • So, after spending all that time on Mother's Day cards, I promptly left them in the car overnight (er, the cards, not the Crazies...although life would have been much easier for a little while...).  That's foggy little brain just thought they would fill themselves out...fill in their own addresses...and stamp themselves.  WTF???  I realized this yesterday as I got into the car to go to the mall (see below).  I started to fill them out right then and there, but the Crazies started whining about how the car was actually supposed to move once we got in, so I let it go.  They may be late, but they are personally filled out by each Crazy...that's another story entirely.  I believe it was at this time that I started deciding that I need two of me and I started making a list of things the other me could be doing while I drove home from the mall.
It was for these reasons, explicitly stated in their rejection letter that the CFMA rejected my application.  What a bunch of aholes, right?

So, I got the hat mentioned earlier this week...I'm pretty sure that I love it!

Note:  I don't normally rush home from the mall, put my purchases on my body, and then take a picture of myself.  I wanted to show Sister because I got her the same one.  I don't love myself that much!