I put a status on FB last night...it read something like this:
"I think I need a storage bin labeled "toys I hate and really want to throw away, but can't due to enormous guilt or fear that a colossal meltdown will occur." Anyone else need that??"
This status was in response to the multitude of annoying toys and toy parts that I keep finding around my house. There was a time where I could keep everything straight, but I have no idea where this tiny little plastic piece (that Matt claims he "has to have") goes. I have no idea which doll owns this tiny little hair clip. Yet, I keep stepping on them, over them, around them...it's getting on my nerves.
Some of the answers I got were sympathetic. Yes, we're all having this problem.
And then I got some solutions.
The number one most popular solution was "throw it away and lie to your children."
So, when I woke up this morning and kept thinking about the responses, I realized that THIS is why teenagers think their parents are totally stupid! Do you remember thinking that your parents were dumb and knew nothing?*
If someone you loved and respected lied to you for years upon end and told you they "didn't know" what happened to your beloved blue lego. Or that they had "no idea" what happened to your purple crayon, you'd start to question their intelligence too!
You'd also start to think they were useless and stop asking them questions (I could see this coming in handy).
Some other solutions were:
- Keep a bin in the closet and explain to your kids that you're giving this toy away to a child that will play with it more (monthly basis, I think).
- Turn that toy backwards on a shelf and if it hasn't been touched in a month, it goes (I really like this one if I could ever get a toy on the damn shelf!).
- Do it while they're sleeping...the meltdowns will happen anyway.
- Tell them you have no idea where their "xyz" is and that they need to keep better track of their toys (I like this one b/c it might mean less cleaning up for me if they think their toys are disappearing b/c they're not putting them away).
Anyway, I'm not sure which route I'll take at this point, but I just love the fact that I'm not the only mother in the world who has lies pouring out of her mouth on a routine basis. I know there are some people out there who believe that honesty is the best policy, but I have delicate feet...and they're being injured on a daily basis...and I just don't deserve this kind of torture!
* Mom, I never thought this, but I knew other kids that did.
14 comments:
I have the same problem with random toys that don't seem to belong anywhere! Drives me nuts and those little things hurt when you step on them unsuspectingly!
I tried to get rid of my twins toys before christmas cause I new they were getting a lot more, and they cried and have since started playing with everything they hadn't played with for months!
So frustrating cause they don't need this many toys, not sure how to get rid of them either! Good luck!
Uh-huh - I imagine you had your own personal thoughts about my intelligence or lack thereof during your teen years. I know for a fact that you question it even now! :)
You didn't have enough toys for me to have this problem while you were growing up - no spoiling grandparents, no money. Perhaps the problem is that the kids have too much these days. Stop buying them useless toys and tell their grandmother to go on hiatus as a prime spoiler of your children - that should work!!
If it has too many parts, it never even makes it in the house from birthday/holidays. It either stays in the car to find a new home or goes into the garage until I can figure out what to do with it.
I lie all the time. If PJ wants something and I tell him no and he starts to have a tantrum, I tell him it's broken or yucky. And he moves on.
I'm enjoying - at least for a little bit longer - the ability to still "edit" what the girls get without too much fuss. There are a couple of presents that didn't make it into the house from our holiday trip to visit family. And I just opened something that was mailed...tutus, of which the girls already have multiple sets. I feel a bit bad on one hand, but not too bad. ;)
I am actually contemplating a post about, when you have kids, people just seem to give you STUFF. Why??? They don't need a new coloring book / stuffed animal / etc., etc., etc., every time you see them (or they go to the mailbox). I truly appreciate the thought...but they'd be just as tickled if you sent them a card with a picture of an animal on the front of it. :)
BTW, love the note to your mom. "I knew other kids that did." You were such a wise teenager, though, surely able to see through the indiscretions of others and learn from their misgivings.
At the beginning of this post, I was a little afraid it was going to be one of those "I don't want to ever lie to my children" kind of posts...but I should have known you better than that! : ) (Not that I am supporting blatant lies just for the fun of it, but come on, who hasn't fibbed to their children at some point??)
I think your mom is exactly right about part of the problem being too much stuff...I know that's an issue in our house! I am getting ready to do another toy purge, and I am still debating whether or not to tell the girls what I am donating. Probably not, since they didn't even notice the last time. If they happen to ask about something, I just casually say I don't know where it might be. They are not overly attached to very many toys, so it works out.
Thankfully my son is pretty good about keeping things sorted and picked up, for the most part. We go in before Christmas and birthday to pull out toys to donate. The last couple of times, I let him help me pick out what to give away and there were some disagreements, but no major meltdowns. I told him if there wasn't room for more stuff, Santa wouldn't be able to leave him anything!
We're about to add a new puppy to the family, so we're stressing that he has to keep everything, especially Legos, picked up or the puppy will eat them.
I have tried lots of different techniques. We just got them involved in an after Christmas purge, worked better than expected. And I found us parents to have more sentimental attachment to some toys - Gah!
But trust me there were toys that I just took and put away. I put toys away in the storage area. If they aren't missed in a couple months, then they go...you know once I remember that I now need to purge them.
so. i had to deal with this two days ago, too. we were looking for something that was missing. we couldn't find it anywhere. i can't even remember what IT is!! at any rate, we got out the flashlights and decided that we were going to look everywhere with flashlights for it. we never did find it, but it turned into another game of looking around with flashlights. then last night they asked if they could look for thomas and "the baggage car" with flashlights. so they left the room while i hid them, they came back in and looked with flashlights until they found them. i know it's only been 48 hours, but no one has requested the original item that was missing :)
When the kids were younger, I used to rotate toys = only some would be out at a time and every month or two, I'd switch it up. Well, now that they are older, they have a shitload more toys and a better memory for what they have...ugh!
I recently purged their playroom of misc lil junk toys - i..e prizes and happy meal toys - to donate to daycare to be used as prizes. They found the bag before i could remember to take it and of course, they LOVED all those things and couldn't bear to part with it. Seriously? you didn't even know it was gone and hadn't seen it in 6 months...but NOW its your favorite toy? whateva!
I don't lie, I just blame my husband. He did it. Bad Daddy.
Ugh, I hate toys that a have a million little pieces, like those damn Ninjago sets that all my boys got at Christmas time. My rule is if you can't keep all the pieces together and the toy can't be played with while it's missing pieces, it gets thrown away.
My kids now know that if they don't play with something that someone else will be getting it and even tell each other as a reminder. HAHA!
LOL at your mom :)
I've made a new rule - if you break it, I throw it out.
I remind them of the prams regularly. We had 2 prams and they kept fiddling with the wheels til they broke and OUT THEY WENT. For real.
I don't lie but I'm actually too straightforward and honest - D says I'm a killjoy :)
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