- how nervous I am about not getting a job for this Fall.
- how I hate not being in control.
- how I am currently very boring at parties (or I'm not...maybe it's other people and I just have a very low tolerance for people I don't already know).
- how I hate these damn night terrors that have started since Matt went under anesthesia.
- how I'm in a funk tonight.
- how I hate every single show on television right now.
- how I hate inequity.
- how the Crazies have become awesome swimmers this summer.
- how I love being "tan." (I say "tan" because I just become a deeper shade of beige...let's be honest).
- how I love wearing less clothes (even if it means showing more).
- how I am DYING to decorate my house, but can't b/c of the aforementioned job situation.
- how lucky I am because even though I want to go back to work, I don't have to and it's nice to have options.
am I ever going to poop alone again?
am I ever going to poop uninterrupted?
am I ever going to be able to ignore my children's pleas for help rather than indelicately shouting "ONE MINUTE...I'M POOPING!!!"
is nothing sacred anymore?
the most interesting thing is when husband and I are pooping at the same time. I tried this as an experiment.
I held it in.
(no I didn't...that's gross)
anyway, we were pooping at the same time.
in different bathrooms.
in case you didn't catch on.
the kids screamed for me.
i answered with the stock answer (see above).
i asked where dad was.
they said (very quietly) that he was pooping...like they couldn't bother him if the house were on fire.
i asked if they could wait.
they said no.
they're terrible little people, I tell ya.
they were not about to bother dad and, to make matters worse, they had to tell me very quietly that he was pooping...like the freaking pope was in town and no one was supposed to know about it!
when I'm in there, it's like a garage sale...little people come in, ask questions, negotiate, take things when I'm not looking, bargain, and then complain about it being stinky.
anyway, instead of all that serious shit, this is what I'll stick with. poop...this is my life...one turd at a time.